I believe there are soooo many mothers that want nothing more than to be able to be a stay-at-home mom and give their husband and home the attention they truly deserve. But it seems so far off…such a distant dream…so “1950s”.
“All you need is faith, trust and a little bit of pixie dust…and then YOU CAN FLY!” ~ Peter Pan
It would be presumptuous for me to say that anyone can “fly” – I know there are situations that require both spouses to work and I know that if that is your situation you are giving your children, husband and home they best attention you can in the situation God has placed you.
But there are three big questions that I have heard over and over again from mothers who desire to stay home but have some doubts standing in their way. My desire today is to give you my thoughts and hopefully bring you to the realization that YOU CAN FLY!
Is it affordable?
This is probably the biggest question of them all, especially if your family has been used to living on two incomes.
From a very young age, whenever I was asked what I wanted to do in the future I would say without hesitation, “become a stay-at-home wife and mom!” The response I would get from most people outside of my immediate circle was a small chuckle and then something like, “Oh sweetie! That’s nice and all, but times have changed, no one can afford to do that anymore! My suggestion is to go get yourself an education, start a career and get used to it.”
Is there anything wrong with a woman getting higher education and spending her life in a career? No. Is it necessary? I am living proof that it is not!
I did go to Cosmetology school and worked in a salon for six years before having a baby. When we calculate up the numbers, I am saving more by staying home then I would be making working 55 hours a week in a salon!
Mind blown? Think about the costs: day care, frequently eating out, second car, insurance, professional clothes, help with the house, no time to cut corners and coupons…the list goes on and on! And on top of all of that, I would barely see my daughter!
Perhaps you have gone up in your field and could easily cover those expenses with plenty to spare? My suggestion would be to follow the advice I give in this linked post. Make a budget and trim EVERYTHING that isn’t a necessity. Try to get your final number down to your husband’s income. Then live according to that budget for three months and see if it is worth it and going to work.
My husband doesn’t have an incredibly large salary and we have cut many corners but it is SOOO worth it!
What if it’s boring or no fun?
*NEWSFLASH* Every job has days that aren’t fun! But the rewards are great!
I didn’t decide to stay home for the fun of it – although I’ve never had a better time in my life. My motive for staying at home is to make an eternal impact on my children, and always be available to invest in my husband and home they way I believe God intended.
*ANOTHER NEWSFLASH* My life is NEVER boring! It is only going to get busier as we have more kids and they get older!
Starting off with one little infant can leave downtime during naps, but with a little bit of intention, they are EASY to fill. Check out my post on always learning. I am so thankful for the downtimes I had with just one little one, because it gave me the chance to jump start my “career education”…being a homemaker/wife/mom is truly an art and one that takes A LOT of learning to get good at.
Treasure those moments!
Am I qualified?
I am a Cosmetologist. Not a math teacher or a science teacher or a history teacher. But I will be teaching a our children all of the necessary school subjects.
I am not a child psychiatrist. But I will be my children’s sole comforter, emotional developer and behavioral trainer during the day.
I am not a theologian. But I will be training our children to learn about God’s Word and follow Him in everything they do.
Being a stay-at-home mommy is a HUGE responsibility! I do not feel worthy, but I must daily remember that I am one of the two people God selected, out of this entire world, to raise our children.
And He doesn’t make mistakes!!!
So with God’s wisdom and the diligence to always be learning something new, we are going to face this amazing thing called parenthood and LOVE every minute of it!
“The second star to the right shines in the night for you to tell you that the dreams you have really can come true!” ~ Peter Pan
If you are considering becoming a stay-at-home mommy, but had a few doubts, hopefully this was helpful to you! I would love to hear from you if you have any other concerns or thoughts!